Post-Christmas Shopping and Family Ties

Today I went shopping with my son. It really is the first full business day of open shops since Christmas and all the stores have discounts and assorted sales.  I blithely assumed that there would be no problem driving to the nearby indoor shopping mall and parking my car, followed by a leisurely stroll through the shops with Sam. 

Ha!  Wrong! Traffic was backed up for about 2 miles from the shops and moving at a snail's pace. Drivers were preoccupied with getting to their destination so most were driving like madmen.  I did manage to get to the parking garage and found a reasonable space for my car.  Once inside the mall all hell broke loose. It was Dante's Inferno - hot, crowded, noisy and extremely claustrophobic.  Suddenly,  I think Sam and I realised that this was a big mistake. We split up - he, not buying a jacket, and me, not buying all sorts of attractively priced things. After one hour we met in this maelstrom and decided that enough is enough. I bought my favourite frozen yogurt and we left.  Sometimes I am so happy that I have reached the point where I no longer need anything, regardless of the discounted price.

After dropping Sam off at a friend's I drove to my local shops, accidentally bumped into a friend and stopped to have coffee with her. We sat together for an hour or so, slowly enjoying our coffee and conversation.  I am so happy I have women friends. There aren't too many of them and as I get older I value my women friends more and more. They allow me to relax and share family woes, share successes and compare diets (or as this is Christmas - non-diets). The only tough part for me is that many of my close women friends and family are so far away.  Maintaining these friendships over distances is not so easy and I know from experience that it takes effort, just like feeding any loving relationship.

Recently I have connected again with cousins in different parts of the world, women I have not seen for maybe 50 years and I am delighted with how much pleasure I feel from this.  When I was a child I was acutely aware of how little extended family I had. I had no grandparents alive and one uncle and aunt close by. My cousins (or more exactly my mother's cousins) were really our family. I'm not sure how often we met, but it seemed like we knew them pretty well and then, as life takes over, we all drifted apart to make our own lives. Through the years we didn't share the celebrations and the tragedies and the mundane things that families share, but after so long, to find these connections again feels very sweet.

It also feels very new.  This morning I watched a nature programme on TV and watched a giraffe being born, unsteady on its legs and struggling to stand up and begin to enjoy life. My new found family is a bit at that stage, a bit awkward, struggling to stand up and find its feet- maybe one day soon we can all find one central spot in the world where we can all meet.  I would like that.

This is a tough old world we live in. I guess its vital to love those we can and share ourselves with them - to be there for them when things are good and to be there when things are not so good. I have said before that I feel very lucky to have so many people in my life, both blood relations and heart connections who make my life so much richer.

All the people shopping today must be loved by someone, but they sure seemed to forget this in their rush to grab a bargain. Let's all slow down and count our blessings today. There's always another bargain waiting.