Tiptoeing mindfully through my day

The abiding image I take away from today is that of a little mouse, a tiny sweet Disneyesque mouse, scurrying from corner to corner, place to place, frantically searching for the mousehole, the way out.  This was the image that came to mind in my meditation today.

I was trying to stay with what is, the here, the now, and sometimes I succeeded, though more often than not my mind wandered away to some unknown place.  It was hot, hot, hot.  Like meditating in a sauna, but with clothes on, and stuffy, but all the better for trying to stay with what is. It gave us all more material to work with.  What was really new for me was doing all of this with eyes open.  I liked this, it kept me more clearly anchored to the world and at the same time, I saw great value in being in the now with eyes open.  Sitting cross-legged in a cave in the Himalayas and quietly chanting aum is very nice, but doesn't help me when I get into a frantic panic spiral whilst shopping in Oxford Street. I need strategies that work in my world, the world of the rush hour and the crowded city.

The next step will be to see if I can build in a short time for regular practice on a regular basis.  I often do groups, courses, seminars, away days.  I come back from them enthused and keen to start doing all these new meditative practices as soon as possible.  I might even buy books or CDs that will help me on the way. Sometimes I read the books and even unwrap the CDs but my enthusiasm and good intentions usually fizzle out in the face of the relentless pace of everyday life.  It's as if I join the meditation gym, pay for an annual membership and then only go once or twice. 

'The road to Hell is paved with good intentions' - I'm not sure I believe that but it is the result of my actions I expect to be judged and to judge myself by.  This was also one of the lessons of today - not to judge ourselves, but to accept.  Acceptance sounds  so simple and in actually, it is, but the doing of it is more challenging. Krishnamurti said, "The seeing is the doing".  To really see things, without me, my filters, my ideas, in the way of seeing, is an art I wish to cultivate and grow.

But not right now. I am pretty tired.  It's still hot outside and now I am going to collapse in a sweaty heap and not meditate by watching TV.