I finally fulfilled the fantasy of hot summery days in SF. The temperature here was in the 90's and it was bloody hot. spent a wonderful morning at the Farmers Market, tasting all these California fruits and treats. Then walked to a sublimely California tea lounge where for inflated prices you got to drink weak tea combined with faux philosophy - wonderful.
The visit with my children is great. They are kind and caring and very capable. I love seeing the way they run their home (much better than I do my own). Everything is pristine and they actually clean and clear all the time. We invited some cousins for dinner last night and it felt 'heimlich' and warm to be entertaining in my kids' home. Makes me proud to be their mum and I don't know if they are like this because of something I've done right, or in spite of what I've done!
I do wonder if my son will every return to the UK. It makes me so sad to think that both my kids will be settled so far away. I think my son would consider coming back, but the economy mitigates against, not to mention his girlfriend! It makes me angry that whole generations of kids are stuck in places they didn't really choose because of work. The economic mess that the world is in is having an effect on all of us, I'm just grateful that my son has a job at all.
It feels really strange and also normal to be here. I want to cook and take care of these 'children' who are no longer children. They don't need me to do this, so it's actually fun to cook a meal, or make some soup. I do wish they didn't feel they had to accompany me everywhere. I like being on my own and shopping and pottering around, so tomorrow I'll try and escape from the well-meaningness of family!
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